Blissqueen

It was warm so I went and layed down in the hammock and closed my eyes.
After some time it began to sway.
A stranger was pushing me.
He pushed me and sang.
I looked at his eyes beaming out over his cherubic cheeks.
He was so pleased with himself.
His name was alex, his mom told me that,
and that he […]

“I buy water at the liquor store across the street from where I live. So I'm walking into the door, and standing, loitering, outside the door is a man. And I walk by him to go in and he says [in a clenched, abrupt voice], 'I want pussy!' Now, I don't want to seem conceited […]

I used to wish that I could make blood run from my eyes
so she would know how much it hurt
I learned to bleed from the inside instead
everytime she would hurt me, I would make another mark
I would carve out another piece, until there is nothing left and I was free.
and now I have the journals […]

BQ, if you ever decide to wear some kind of word across your ass,
say on your shorts or sweat pants
(I sincerely hope you never do this)
make sure you do not lose some of the letters up your butt
like what was happening to some guy at the gym today.
or if you know your butt can not […]

we had a little girl
It may have been ours or just his from before
there was something wrong with her
we took her to a doctor and and he said
she was severely alienated.
That she would have to go back inside for a while
back in the womb.
She hadn't been ready to come out yet.
I worried, there was no […]

Scattered all over the busy terminal
They have unpacked me
now I am being scolded
for having too many shoes
and an overly ambitions assortment of books
I had been impossibly overstuffed
Now strangers are looking at my personal items
and I know they will never fit back in again

to listen to
the sound of young new york
http://www.tigersushi.com/site/frameset.jsp?page=findSng.jsp&FindNm=If%7CI%7CGave%7CYou%7CA%7CParty
to read
The wind up bird chronicle
by murakami

I love Mashimaro
http://www.mashimaro.com.tw/
I went downtown looking for him last night.
Instead I found
MASASHIMARU

That what she told me to do
To help with the sadness.
Everytime I look at the bottle I can
Hear her voice, drawing out every special
Sound of the word gli-TT-Teeeer.
It makes me smile, so I guess you could
Say it is working.
I am concocting my own special
Exorcism, to include, but not to be limited to
Glitter & Lipstick.

I have decided to get better,
to talk to people again
to take a shower
and change out of my pajamas
so much for hitting the groung running,
I just hit the ground.
I will run again
then I will rock directly

All of the sudden I noticed that the sound track had stopped
I didn’t know how long it had been, couldn’t recall the last song.
Now, I have space to regret.
Everything so strange.
Unfolding slowly like an accident
And when it stops
All I can see is the hush
And the glass, spread out on the
Road sparkling
Intense and motionless
nothing will […]

I feel like shit

Now I don’t know where I’m going
All I know to do is hit the ground running
-smog

is that what it is called when I bend over
and my thong shows?

They shouted at me from the water that I was too small.
It had all been decided, it was a fact.
The bigger kids knew it and I wasn’t sure just exactly how.
So I watched.
I mostly watched her,
The woman with the long blond hair
And the bikini, the long legs and the very flat belly.
The next day I […]

I am walking right behind her,
Sizing her up
Her extra low cut sweat pants
Her extra short and tight halter top
The exposed upper ass tattoo
I think
“THAT is trying WAY too hard”
and then I catch a glimpse of
my-self in the glass
no make-up, hair a mess
“THAT is NOT trying at all”
I don’t know which is worse.
then,
while I was working […]

“It's difficult to get self-abuse victims to stop blaming themselves for what's happened,” Hattchett said. “They think it's their fault, because they're too weak to resist. And, despite everything that has happened, they often maintain strong feelings for their abusers. I've seen it happen time and time again.”
http://theonion.com/4004/news1.html

EXOTIC FOREIGNER ALIAS = Favorite Spice + Last Foreign Vacation Spot
Chipotle paris
SOCIALITE ALIAS = Silliest Childhood Nickname + Town Where You First Partied
Hootenanny Portland
“FLY GUY” ALIAS (a la J. Lo) = First Initial + First Two or Three Letters of your Last Name
J. Ha
DIVA ALIAS = Something Sweet Within Sight + Any Liquid in Kitchen
Chocolate […]

When I die, I want your hands on my eyes:
I want the light and the wheat of your beloved hands
to pass their freshness over me once more:
I want to feel the softness that changed my destiny.
I want you to live while I wait for you, asleep.
I want your ears still to hear the wind, I […]

I got a massage, but it was really a healing and
Energy treatment
After wards she walked me to the wall of light
it was infinite and bright bright golden lemon yellow
she said, go to the light
and suddenly I felt this enormous magnetism
pulling me towards it,
and I knew that something fundamental had
changed in me.
Afterwards, she had me come […]