Blissqueen

“The moment you commit and quit holding back, all sorts of
unforeseen incidents, meetings and material assistance will
rise up to help you. The simple act of commitment is a powerful
magnet for help!” - Napoleon Hill

I am going to eat so much sushi that I can not move.

I was at a carnival unlike any I have actually been to. So much was going on, it was romantic and seedy. There was something wrong with me, I was sick.
I was weak, delirious really and my head hurt. A women helped me, she found a place for me to lie down and got help. […]

in the howse

Tonight I went to the LA premiere of One Hour Photo
http://www.apple.com/trailers/fox_searchlight/one_hour_photo/
see it and tell me what you think

“…but I'm always being invaded by others' souls
so I can't see my own soul very well”
-Shuntaro Tanikawa
One night you fall asleep with an ungiven kiss
on your lips, you fall asleep in your kiss.
It is like sending yourself on an all night errand
to interview echos about where they think
they're coming from. Where did it come from
anyway, […]

In my mouth

Blamm, blamm, blamm
Slow motion, we all hit the ground
Lights off
Boys peering out the window to the street
Girls finding the phone
Calling
Hearts beating
5 minutes later police arrive
we go outside
across the street someone is dead
I drive home all shaky, helicoptor above

I miss telegrams from my boyfriend in Brazil
I miss air-mail letters, that took weeks to come, on super-fine paper with traces of DNA
I miss vinyl spinning all night long
A Love Supreme
And its slinking reflection of a candle being burnt all the way down.
I miss the warm ring of an analogue telephone and the sound of […]

When confronted with grief
All I want to do
Is eat sushi
And sleep

I buried her in my yard…. right where she would come out to meet me.
Buried her with some cat nip and some asparagus, in
one of my mother's antique lace pillowcases.

Rest in Peace dear sweet kittie

Rox is going to have surgery on Monday. Cross your fingers it is just a cyst.

Something is wrong with my kitty Roxy. Her abdomen is swollen so large that she is walking funny.
I am waiting for lab results, which will not come till tomorrow at 10 am, they were supposed to come at 10 am today.
She is such a great spirit, I hope she pulls through.

It is hard to get the door now that I have gone to pieces.
It is like being undressed.
Wait, wait one moment let me get a towel, let me get some glue.
It is hard to get the phone too.
People might hear my fragments, like gravel and sand.
I have turned the ringer off.

The red “brake pad” light went on in my car the other day.
I wish instead it would just cut the crap and the light would say
“twelve hundred dollars”
just to get me used to the idea that my wallet was going to bleed.
In fact, I wish that in every situation a light would come on […]

The other night I lay in a saltwater pool in the dessert. The wind was hot and the sky was clear. I lost count of the stars somewhere after one-hundred. Earlier I had been playing “bug-watch” and had rescued many bugs from the water including a beetle that kept hurling itself back in. I had […]