my life is a high school girls fantasy. All I am doing is working out (I have lost 5 pounds) talking to boys and laughing with my girlfriends about asses. all they same things I was concerned about in highschool, except now I have a nice car and all my friends can stay out as late as they want. Read more →

You have no cause for anything but gratitude and joy. Buddhist teaching Read more →

Hiking leaves me feeling refreshed and good. I am happy with my life. I have almost finished my infinite tasks and am glad. It is good to feel. Of course, it is easy for me to say right now, because today I am feeling well. But, feeling is important. I have worked so fucking hard to feel, that I am… Read more →

today in the parking lot at ralph's I hear this “hey asshole” apparently some guy pulled into another guys space. These two gentlemen were only about 5 yards apart. It stuck me that people will say things from their cars that they would never say if they were just walking down the street, or at work, or having dinner. Read more →

It has made me think of all the ideas I have had, how I have discounted them and made myself practical. Made myself practical because I thought if I didn't I wouldn't survive, now I realize that parts of me have not. gone so dormant that they have atrophed. time to wake-up. Read more →

my new hero is http://harrellfletcher.com/ I don't know who my last hero was or if I had one. Today I went to a lecture and it was so inspiring it brought tears to my eyes. Harrell Fletcher does the most amazing shit! It makes my attempts at building community seem so superficial and piddily assed. such as ” “S” is… Read more →

from the Joy of Cooking ” It should possess a distinct character, but never steal the show. A dressing should be well seasoned (typically with a tang of acidity to deliver zest to the food) but not so assertive that it overwhelms the taste of the more delicate salad. And finally, a salad dressing should have enough body to lightly… Read more →

I finally learned to make good salad dressing. 2 parts vinegar to 3 parts olive oil. The trick is to add the oil very slowly and stir it to make it very thick. Other things that will help to emulsify it are adding chopped herbs, or garlic, or cream, or mayo to the vinegar before adding the oil yummy. I… Read more →

One of the ideas that is pushed in rehabs is the idea of the dysfunctional family. It is encouraged to see ones life through a filter, “everything was horrible and fucked up” (i.e.: dysfunctional). Doing this photo album is giving me a different perspective. For so long, I have seen my life that way, and I want to go through… Read more →

When I went back to Portland, the first night I was there, I felt so devastated so crushed. This was the town I had run from the very instant I could manage it. It was here that I was left by my father and had terrible misunderstandings with my mother. It was here that my mother was so depressed and… Read more →